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Volume 1, Number 8
09-23-98

TIM'S FAVORITE FIVE FOCI OF A STRONG PERSONAL FOUNDATION

When thinking about going after the "perfect" life most folks include some big changes and lofty goals in their plans. Constructing an ideal life is similar to building a skyscraper in that the taller the structure, the deeper and stronger the foundation must be. If we want big things from life, it makes sense to start by strengthening and fortifying our own foundation. One's personal foundation is defined by the way one relates to self, others and the world. This Tim's Favorite Five list describes some basic strategies for strengthening one's personal foundation. It is a consolidation of strategies presented in previous editions along with some powerful new ones. All of these strategies are universal in that attending to them helps set the stage for success, regardless of what your goals or aspirations may be.

1. Take Extremely Good Care Of Yourself.
   Extreme self-care is the practice of maintaining yourself (physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually) with diligence and reverence. It is an active and continuing investment in the most important asset you will ever have. Are you current with health care maintenance practices like eye exams and mamography screenings? Do you engage in activities that regenerate your mind and spirit on a regular basis? (See Salubrations Volume 1, #2 for more detailed information on extreme self-care.)
   
   
2. Stop Tolerating Anything.
   We've become so accustomed to "putting up with" in our culture that that we are often numb to the number of unnecessary irritations that continuously drain our energy. Expend a concerted amount of energy for as long as it takes to handle or eliminate the things that bug you. You'll conserve tons of energy in the long run and feel great about yourself, too! (See Salubrations Volume 1, #4 for suggestions on zapping tolerations.)
   
   
3. Get Complete With Your Past; Stay Complete With Your Present.
   Nothing slows progress towards goal achievement faster than an accumulation of incomplete work and unfinished interpersonal business. Get in the habit of taking tasks to completion as soon as you engage them. If the task or project is too big to be handled in one fell swoop, break it up into doable sub-tasks, and schedule each one on your calendar. If you can't fit a task or activity into your calendar without straining, delegate the task or decline it. Set time aside to clear your slate of "to-do's." (See Salubrations Volume 1, #6 for tips on eliminating to-do lists.)
   
   
4. Extend Your Boundaries.
   Boundaries are rules we set to establish what people can and cannot do to or around us. Boundaries protect us physically and emotionally, they conserve our energy, and the help to simplify our lives by distancing us from potential problem situations. Boundaries include things like not allowing anyone to smoke in your home or car, not allowing yourself to be subject to verbal or physical aggression, or not accepting non-emergency phone calls after a certain time in the evening. Most of us are aware of the boundaries we would like to enjoy, but many are often hesitant to establish them for fear of negative reactions from others. In reality, having extensive boundaries engenders respect from others. It also helps you to be more present and available to those who will appreciate and benefit from your actions. Extend your boundaries, educate those around you as to what your boundaries are and how they can honor them. Show them the way be asking about any of their boundaries which may be unclear to you and demonstrate unfailing respect for them. The result is a fascinating paradox: you'll feel much closer to the people you care about and at the same time enjoy a sense of greater personal space. It's well worth the effort!
   
   
5. Raise Your Standards.
   Standards are rules we set to establish what is acceptable or not acceptable in terms of our own behavior; how we interact with others. Some noteworthy standards include: always telling the truth, being on time or early for every appointment, and always being responsible for how what we say is heard by others. Note that it's important that one's standards keep pace with their boundaries. A person with very high standards but low boundaries is often finds themselves used or even victimized. On the other hand, a person who maintains strict boundaries but is not mindful of how their behavior impacts others is usually disliked and disrespected. Extend your boundaries and raise your standards proportionately to create a problem-free zone around you; avoid lot of unnecessary "debris" on the path to your success!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Dr. Tim Cline is a success coach. He supports people in attaining what they REALLY want out of life. Tim coaches his clients to plan and complete the actions needed to optimize their health, attain success, and enjoy a true sense of fulfillment in their personal and professional lives. Tim coaches individuals and groups around the country via telephone. His services also include motivational speaking, workshops, seminars, and retreats. An experienced scientist, health educator, psychotherapist, project manager, consultant, athlete, fitness trainer and skills training specialist, Tim is well qualified to coach anyone who is interested in attaining good health and a happy, prosperous life. Use the contact information below to schedule a free consultation.

Copyright 1998 by T. R. Cline. All rights reserved